one time a white student from the university in my home town was talking to a student that came from africa to study and said “wow growing up in africa must have been so tough for you” and he just replied “my family could buy you” and walked away
josh hutcherson’s parents are probably called josh hutcherdad and josh hutchermom
actually their names are chris hutcherson and michelle hutcherson
So tell me,
When did you graduate from Killjoke University?
2004 i was valedictorian
it does not matter how slow you go as long as you’re not in front of me
You know what’s a big turn on? When you’re making out with someone and they just randomly get on top of you. Yeah that is fucking great.
I want a sugar daddy to warm up my bank account in this chill of winter
someone right now could be thinking dirty thoughts about you
I encourage those who are to share them with me.
If you think dirty thoughts about me I’ll get offended if you don’t share them with me
Yeah this is all fun and games until some stranger on the internet tells you he wants to fuck your armpit
the other day we were discussing dating and this one dude was like “I don’t see the big deal why can’t people just ask people out without all the fuss” and another guy was like “well you get nervous and you get butterflies in your stomach ya know” and the first dude looked the other dude straight in the eye and said “DIGEST THEM.”
white people be like “i love mexican food” but they cant name anything else than nachos and maybe burritos
petition for jennifer lawrence and emma stone to co-star in a movie as lesbian zombie hunters
28 thousand notes, somebody call hollywood
Over 60,000 hey is that Hollywood I hear?
Yes, this is hollywood
hi hollywood, this is dad